Avoiding Offense
Matthew 11:2 And when John had heard in prison about the works of Christ, he sent two of his disciples 3 and said to Him, “Are You the Coming One, or do we look for another?” 4 Jesus answered and said to them, “Go and tell John the things which you hear and see: 5 The blind see and the lame walk; the lepers are cleansed and the deaf hear; the dead are raised up and the poor have the gospel preached to them. 6 And blessed is he who is not offended because of Me.”
GROUP DISCUSSION: Why do you think John the Baptist, who had witnessed Jesus’ baptism and heard God’s voice “This is my beloved Son in whom I am well pleased”, still struggled with offense while in prison (Matthew 11:2–6)?
In the end John ended up dying in prison and was beheaded. When you are offended, you block your blessing. Offense is a blessing blocker. You cannot be blessed operating in offense. Some have not seen the blessings because the blessings cannot show up where offense is. His offense caused him to start questioning in doubt the mission of Jesus. You can’t start questioning those things and think that’s not going to hinder the anointing in your life.
Offenses are temptations because its pressure applied to your flesh to go against that Word. When you are offended you are tempted. Tempted to walk out of love, to respond in the flesh. People leave churches because they get offended. Offense is an opportunity for you to develop and become mature because there will always be temptation, it will not stop. If you continue to yield to offenses you will allow your life to be directed by offenses. You will end up in the wrong place trying to figure out what’s wrong with your life.
GROUP DISCUSSION: How does offense block blessings in a believer’s life? Can you think of times when offense may have delayed or hindered your own spiritual growth?
When the enemy shows up with the temptation of offense, it’s because something is about to break loose in your life. Something great is about to happen. The enemy is desperate to use offenses, and you need to make being offended elementary stuff. Offense will seduce you out of the will of God. Offense will take you far away from what God has planned for you and will die in that place never reaching your call.
GROUP QUESTION: How does offense seduce people out of God’s will, and why is it dangerous to make decisions while offended?
Acts 16: 22 The crowd joined in the attack against Paul and Silas, and the magistrates ordered them to be stripped and beaten with rods. 23 After they had been severely flogged, they were thrown into prison, and the jailer was commanded to guard them carefully. 24 When he received these orders, he put them in the inner cell and fastened their feet in the stocks. 25 About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them. 26 Suddenly there was such a violent earthquake that the foundations of the prison were shaken. At once all the prison doors flew open, and everyone’s chains came loose. 27 The jailer woke up, and when he saw the prison doors open, he drew his sword and was about to kill himself because he thought the prisoners had escaped. 28 But Paul shouted, “Don’t harm yourself! We are all here!” 29 The jailer called for lights, rushed in and fell trembling before Paul and Silas. 30 He then brought them out and asked, “Sirs, what must I do to be saved?” 31 They replied, “Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved—you and your household.” 32 Then they spoke the word of the Lord to him and to all the others in his house. 33 At that hour of the night the jailer took them and washed their wounds; then immediately he and all his household were baptized. 34 The jailer brought them into his house and set a meal before them; he was filled with joy because he had come to believe in God—he and his whole household.
Like John the Baptist, Paul and Silas were in jail too. They handled the situation differently even though they were also beaten, humiliated, and bound in chains. Because they refused to be offended, they ended up being free. They sang praises in jail and the prisoners and guards heard them. Then God loosed them and set them free. Not only that, the jailers whole family was saved and baptized!
As you know the Christian life is not a storm free life. The question is, how you will handle that opportunity to become offended. Will you doubt Jesus, or sing praises to him? This will greatly determine the outcome of your storm. Paul and Silas could have been offended at God or the people who hurt them—but they chose worship instead.
GROUP QUESTION: Why is refusing to take offense such a powerful act of faith?
Matthew 15:21 After leaving there, Jesus withdrew to the district of Tyre and Sidon. 22 And a Canaanite woman from that district came out and began to cry out [urgently], saying, “Have mercy on me, O Lord, Son of David (Messiah); my daughter is cruelly possessed by a demon.” 23 But He did not say a word in answer to her. And His disciples came and asked Him [repeatedly], “Send her away, because she keeps shouting out after us.” 24 He answered, “I was commissioned by God and sent only to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.” 25 But she came and began to kneel down before Him, saying, “Lord, help me!” 26 And He replied, “It is not good (appropriate, fair) to take the children’s bread and throw it to the dogs.”
She was now being compared to a dog! Any other person would be offended by this but she was pursuing something in humility. There was nothing He could say that would stop her from pursuing her miracle. She was not going to let offense take away the deliverance she needed for her child. Some people come to church and get offended by a message they don’t like and then leave and miss their miracle, healing, or deliverance because offense moves them to a place God did not call them to.
27 She said, “Yes, Lord; but even the pet dogs eat the crumbs that fall from their [young] masters’ table.” 28 Then Jesus answered her, “Woman, your faith [your personal trust and confidence in My power] is great; it will be done for you as you wish.” And her daughter was healed from that moment.
GROUP QUESTION: The Canaanite woman refused to let offense stop her from receiving her miracle. What does this teach us about persistence and humility in prayer?
If you get offended by God, who else can help you?
Isaiah 45:9 “Woe to him who strives with his Maker! Let the potsherd strive with the potsherds of the earth! Shall the clay say to him who forms it, ‘What are you making?’ Or shall your handiwork say, ‘He has no hands’?
Every time you are offended by God, you delay or destroy your destiny. Job 9 God is wise in heart and mighty in strength. Who has hardened himself against Him and prospered? How do you expect to prosper if you harden your heart against God? No one hardens his heart against God and wins. Be free from foolish anger.
In the New Testament, the Greek word often translated as “offense” is skandalon (σκάνδαλον), from which we get the English word “scandal.” Skandalon literally means: “a trap,” “a snare,” or “a stumbling block.” It originally referred to the trigger of a trap — the stick that would cause it to snap shut. Spiritually, it represents something that causes a person to stumble, fall away, or take bait.
So, to be “offended” in the biblical sense doesn’t just mean having hurt feelings. It means to stumble spiritually, to trip over something that keeps you from walking in faith, love, or obedience. Jesus even said in Matthew 24:10 that “many will be offended, betray one another, and hate one another.” That shows how offense becomes a trap — leading to bitterness, division, and broken faith.
GROUP QUESTION: How can we guard our hearts from hardening against God when prayers seem unanswered or situations don’t change?
